


WHY [OIKAWA TOORU AU]

by tooruswheels



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Denial of Feelings, Drinking, Drunk Texting, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Fanfiction, Getting to Know Each Other, High School, Idiots in Love, Iwaizumi Hajime Is So Done, Medium burn ??, Oikawa Tooru is Bad at Feelings, Oikawa Tooru is a Tease, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Overthinking, Protective Karasuno Volleyball Club, Rivals to Lovers, Romance, She/her pronouns for reader, Social Media, Teasing, Texting, annoying each other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-15 09:15:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 5,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29311689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tooruswheels/pseuds/tooruswheels
Summary: Y/N doesn't like Oikawa. Oikawa wants to know why. But the only moment where he's brave enough to talk to her, it's when he's drunk.OIKAWA TOORU X FEM!READER. I DO NOT OWN THE "HAIKYUU!!" UNIVERSE NOR ITS CHARACTERS, all credit goes to Haruichi Furudate.original by tooruswheels (was rippedjjeans when this got posted) [2021].
Relationships: Haikyuu/Reader, Oikawa Tooru/Reader
Kudos: 19





	1. GENESIS

**Author's Note:**

> i wanted to use this space to state that english isn't my first language, so grammar mistakes and else will be corrected as soon as possible. on a sidenote, lowercase and spelling mistakes are intentional (unless...they...y'know, aren't. hehe.)
> 
> i'll do my best to write y/n as physically universal as possible so everyone feels included, but i will use she/her pronouns/fem!reader descriptions. 
> 
> hope this clears up a few points. see you in later chapters!

**ONE YEAR PRIOR** to the beginning of this story.

* * *

You wiped the tears on your face very quietly, without taking your eyes off the floor of your bedroom.

"Seriously, Y/N. You need to learn when to stop."

"I said I'm sorry."

"It's clearly not enough."

To say something shifted inside of you was an understatement.

At the very age of 16, you were reckless like any other kid. But in your case, your parents seemed to think you were the only girl on the planet earth to take jokes too far, to make unfortunate comments out loud, to tell the truth. And it bothered them. It bothered everyone around you, apparently. That's why you were going to a different high school, unlike your group of friends or even other classmates. Nobody you knew was going to your new school. 

To be honest, you **_weren't_ **the problem. You just didn't knew that yet. 

You were very extroverted to other people's eyes, but that was because you showed everyone a different version who you were. You actually kept lots of things to yourself. The most important, private ones were only reserved for your diaries and pillows. But around otheres, everywhere was a party if you were there. You were shameless, fun, loud. For a while it was enough.

You were taking it too far some days. Over exaggerating and acting like a puppet to fill the expectations of others around you. Too many jokes and too many words came out of your mouth but no one laughed. It was becoming anoying.

That was the breaking point, where everyone started to take a step far from you.

Your “friends” didn't cry much either when you told them you were leaving to a different school. Actually, they didn't cry at all. And you thought it was your fault.

Like I said. **_It really wasn't._ **But at that time you were unaware of it.

That's why when you started the new year on Karasuno High School, you were way too terrified to approach to _anyone._ You didn't knew how to behave anymore.

Turns out, _anyone_ ended up approaching to you one time in class.

"Hi!" Nishinoya laughed when you jumped on your sit. "I'm Yuu Nishinoya. You must be new around here!"

_Obviously._

"¡Tanaka!" he basically yelled, turning some heads. "Look! A new girl with a brain we can wash!"

Soon after that, Nishinoya introduced you to the entirety of his volleyball team and you ended up being friends with all of them.

But you weren't you, that's for sure. You were a new version of yourself. Which, to be honest, was a lot better than everything you were before. You actually liked yourself this time. And you were pretty honest with your personal stuff. Not all of it, but most of it. You found comfort on those guys.

And you promised to stay that way, never returning to who you were before.

Until that one time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll make sure to point out when dates and hours are important, like in the previous chapter.

**IT WAS A FRIDAY,**

late in the night when one text came in. You grabbed and checked your phone in disgust and confusion by the message on your lockscreen.

 ** _[1:10] unknown:_**  
hey baby

You gotta be kidding me.

There was a 50 percent chances that a weirdo found your number and was texting you on purpose, and the other 50 percent equals to a mistake _. (It can happen. Typos are everywhere these days)._

What disgusted you wasn't the text itself, it was the fact that it came from a number that wasn't on your contact list. Which can be actually scary, because the world is literally upside down with all the grooming, kidnapping, catfish and God knows what else. So you stopped for a second thinking what your response was going to be.

Not give information of any kind. Found out who this person was. And either block them, or relax and save their number.

 ** _[1:13] y/n:_**  
who is this

Dry and concise. Perfect, really.

 ** _[1:15] unknown:_**  
oikawa

 _Cut the cameras._ You sat really still on your bed, your hands slightly shaking and your eyes wide open while your mind worked inhumanly fast. Suddenly you felt a little bit sick to your stomach. Shut up. Shut _the fucking fuck_ up.

 ** _[1:17] unknown:_**  
don't leave me on read  
:(

 ** _[1:20] y/n:_**  
tooru?

You doubted for a second, feeling really dumb. Who else could it be?

 ** _[1:21] unknown:_**  
well yea

 ** _[1:24] y/n:_**  
um  
its y/n

 ** _[1:28] unknown:_**  
wronf number

Of course it was. You locked the screen and threw the phone under the pillow. A ridiculous amount of embarrassment filed you, something that didn't happen often. A small _buzz buzz_ came from under your pillow and sighed while taking your phone on your hands again.

 ** _[1:31] unknown_** :  
wait  
like  
y/n y/l?

Now what in the hell...

 ** _[1:33] y/n:  
_**yes

 _ **[1:34] unknown:**  
_oH  
then right number  
hi  
soru  
sirry  
sorry  
for what ibjust texted  
hehe  
i cannog write  
i promise im actually good with this  
eith my hands  
like  
like in volleyball not nothibg else

Uncertain of what was going on, you frowned while typing a response. You deleted and typed again. And then deleted and typed again. Maybe leaving him on read or delivered was the best option.

 ** _[1:36] y/n:_**  
are you okay?

 ** _[1:37] oikawa:_**  
yes 100$  
100%

 ** _[1:46] oikawa:_**  
you know  
i think about yiu very often

You stared at one point of your room, as if you were in _The Office._ This started feeling like a prank. Something was very wrong in this situation. And you weren't actually sure if you wanted to find out what it was.

 ** _[1:50] oikawa:_**  
very often  
ever since that one time


	3. Chapter 3

**THE STRANGE FEELING**

of being watched was hanging up on you for the entire week. You were absolutely embarrassed about the fact that Oikawa had your phone number, that he texted you, that he remembered about certain things you said and did, that he called you "baby" and the fact that he actually said you were on his mind often. 

Often. 

You shook your head. It was stupid how easily you got self-conscious. Whatever. Whatever he thinks, it doesn't matter. That wasn't you that night.

That was drunk you, and she's a whole different bitch.

 _"Cooooome on."_ Suga said, with a small pout on his mouth. "What's up with you?"

"I have... lots of things on my mind." you replied softly. It was the eight time he asked you to go to another party with them, and you kept saying “no”. You heard a infamous laugh behind you, making you roll your eyes out of pure instinct. 

"Really? Damn, that's crazy."

"Shut up, Tsukishima. Go check out some dinosaur bones or something."

He gasped dramatically and pretended to be offended by your words, getting up and walking towards the court to meet Yamaguchi. _Salt on salt crime_ you heard Suga mutter.

"That's just another great reason to go out on Friday! Get free, Y/N." He threw his arms over his head before standing up and following Tsukki, making you smile. Suga was so good at making people feel better. Sometimes way too good. Kinda manipulative, honestly. But he looked so soft on the outside it was hard to call him out on it.

It was hard to keep it a secret, even if it didn't had to be a secret on the first place. You knew that. They were going to understand the situation, maybe give you any type of advice and cheerful words to make you feel better. But it was so embarrassing to you that even think about it made you wanna hide under the bed forever. You sighed, once again, moving your eyes to the other side of the court. Hinata was jumping around. Kageyama was screaming at him. Daichi was trying to separate them while Asahi just looked up to the ceilings, and you saw his lips form the phrase _“why me, God?”._

You laughed. Because honestly, you had the same question.

* * *

One thing about Oikawa Tooru, he was no quitter. You were sure of that. The reasons behind it were a mistery to you, because in his situation, you would've given up at literally the very first sight of trouble.

He was different, you guessed.

"Iwa" he began. His partner sighed in tiredness, not ready for whatever could come next. It was almost six in the afternoon, and he was hoping to leave soon. The least thing in the world he wanted was entering a deep, weird or dumb conversation with Oikawa about all those deep, weird or dumb things that lived on the mind of his childhood friend.

"Yes?"

He doubted before continuing, trying to think of what to say and how to say it without giving much context to it. He knew his friend wasn't going to judge him (much. Because, giving a second thought to it, he was definitely going to judge him. Probably give him a lecture as well).

"What do you think of Y/N?"

Iwazuimi frowned, not sure of which one of all the Y/N Oikawa knew was about. "Who?"

"Y/L! From Karasuno!"

"Oh, the [hair color] haired one? I don't know her at all, I think I saw her once. Why?"

Tooru clicked his tongue, tensing a little. When Hajime looked at his friend, he knew that there was one answer and one answer only to that question, and the resignation in his eyes became visible. Oikawa was, probably, never going to change. Is not that his behavior was extremely toxic or evil, but in the end, it was harmful to him and him only. And Iwa had no way to stop him.

"Nothing. Just curious."

Oikawa Tooru was no quitter. For better or for worse.


	4. Chapter 4

**WHEN THE WEEKEND ARRIVED AGAIN,**

you made sure to hide into your room and avoid your friends at all costs. You meant no harm by it, but they were pretty pushy when it came to changing your mind. One thing they all agreed with was that you were stubborn, in ways no human being was ever before. When you had your mind made up, there was no way something was going to change that. At least not easily.

_**Crows plus 1** _

_**[23:04] Suga(r):**_  
I find your behavior really outrageous and evil, y/n.

_Suga(r) changed the subject of the groupchat to "Crows and a rat"._

**[23:05] y/n:**  
you are so mean and FOR WHAT

**[23:06] Baldnaka:**

kinda deserved ngl  
you're worse than tsukishima

 **[23:07] Glasses:**  
that's insulting... to me. don't compare me to her.

 **[23:08] Noya:**  
yeah no cap bro you crossed the line with that one

 **[23:10] daichi <3:**  
stop bullying her into doing something she doesn't wanna do, please :)

 **[23:12] Baldnaka:**  
someone drank their Respect Women juice today

 **[23:12] daichi <3:**  
stfu or i won't pick you up

_Asahee-hee changed the subject of the groupchat to "Jesus lovers"_

_Baldnaka changed the subject of the groupchat to "y/n is a boomer"_

_Suga(r) changed the subject of the groupchat to "y/n is a rat"_

_Queen Kiyoko changed the subject of the groupchat to "Crows and y/n💌"_

**[23:15] Queen Kiyoko:**  
leave her alone

 **[23:15] Suga(r):**  
sorry  
 ****

 **daichi <3:**  
sorry  
 ****

 **Baldnaka:**  
sorry  
 ****

 **Noya** :  
sorry  
 ****

 **Asahee-hee:**  
sorry  
 ****

 **YamaGucci** :  
sorry  
 ****

 **Sunshine** :  
sorry  
 ****

 **Kingyama** :  
sorry  
 ****

 **Kinoshita 🙈:**  
sorry  
 ****

 **Ennoshita 🙉:**  
sorry  
 ****

 **Narita 🙊:**  
sorry  
 ****

 **Glasses:**  
👍

 **[23:18] y/n:**  
it's quiet ain't no back talk

 **[23:19] baby yachi:**  
😌👆

You laughed out loud, resting your phone down and focusing on the screen of your laptop. You were kinda bummed out that you weren't with the guys, but the hatred you felt about not being in control of yourself was bigger then your willing to party. Alright, that was an exaggeration. It's not like you killed someone while drunk. As far as you knew. But you were still thinking about that one last incident, and until you got over that regret on the center of your chest, you wanted to stay inside, in your room, and not think about anything else.

"So true." you nodded, without taking your eyes out of the screen while Mamma Mia! played on it. It was you comfort movie, okay? Tsukishima would call it basic and annoying, but it was amazing. Everybody loves Mamma Mia!... even him. No matter how much he tries to hide it.

The phone on your night stand vibrated loudly, irritating you. You kinda hoped your friends were sending you some drunk texts, voice messages or even videos to make your night better. No night, day, week, month or year can be bad if you had drunk Nishinoya singing Partition by Beyonce.

Someone was clearly drunk in your DMs. Just not who you expected it to be.

 **[02:46] oikawa:**  
why arebt you her3?

God's timing sucks, you told yourself. You got so nervous, you started laughing silently. Totally not a psycho. You stared at the screen of your phone and then to your laptop, hoping Meryl Streep was going to save you. She wasn't, obviously, so you had to pause the movie and start using your brain. 

**[02:47] y/n:**  
oikawa-san, why are you texting me?

 **[02:49] oikawa:**  
n9w you wanna implement the honorifics  
don't make me laugh

That comment alone made you sick to your stomach. Was he joking, or he purposefully wanted to embarrass you?

 **[02:51] y/n:**  
i didn't feel like going

 **[02:52] oikawa:**  
why

 **[02:52] y/n:**  
i just didnt  
put your phone down and go enjoy yourself and your friends

 **[02:54] oikawa:**  
im not a child  
you dont get to tell.me whay to do  
im enjoyinf

 **[02:55] y/n:**  
ok

 **[03:01] oikawa** :  
ur so dry

 **[03:02] y/n:**  
i don't owe you my fun side, oikawa-san. we're not friends or anything

 **[03:04] oikawa:**  
oh i realised  
but i wanna know wyh  
why  
*

 **[03:05] y/n:**  
we dont know each other like that  
go back to the party, please

 **[03:09] oikawa:**  
no  
i wanna know  
why you said that

 **[03:11] y/n:**  
what?

 **[03:12] oikawa:**  
you know, what you said to me  
that time

So he does remember. Actually, he thinks about it often, like he said last week. Guilt started expanding in your chest and you bit your lip anxiously. This was terrible. Horrible even.

 **[03:14] y/n:**  
im sorry, oikawa-san  
i wasn't thinking

 **[03:15] oikawa:**  
sstop it eith the honorifics  
i know you don't mean them  
just tell me why

Was it really that deep? Sure, what you did was wrong. But you never expected much to pick it up and never let go of it. That made you feel even worse, knowing that your drunk words actually made a way under his skin, making him upset and probably sad.

 **[03:21] oikawa:**  
i know it was stupid  
but i cant stop thinkinf about it  
i can't stand n9t being liked  
it sucks  
so much

Your heart ached for him while your brain took you back to that one night two weeks ago.


	5. Chapter 5

**THAT _ONE_ TIME.**

* * *

You grabbed Ennoshita by his shoulders, singing loud. He laughed; if there wasn't any alcohol in both of your systems he would've probably been a little taken back by your actions. This time, he decided to relax and sang along with you. Ennoshita being relaxed was something you really didn't see everyday, and being able to bring this man to a party was just a miracle. A one time thing. Soon, you'd realise that that whole night was supposed to be a one time thing.

Oikawa, a few feet away, was in his own world. He liked this song and partying in general, but the fact that a group of girls were looking at him so much and making signs with her hands simulating a phone while singing to him was a little bit much. He decided to move to the backyard, with a glass on his hand. He tried to be the type of not drinking much, solidly because he never knew how'd he get exactly if he did. Sometimes he was pretty euphoric, others, very melancholic and sad. Tonight, he wasn't in the mood to play Russian roulette with a bottle of vodka, especially not when there was so many people around him.

Time started going fast the second you also stepped into the garden, or at least that's how he remembers it. You could barely walk, but you kept singing on the low. Tooru raised one eyebrow when you looked at him, having a little laugh to himself. 

Your mouth opened widely, making an "o" shape. You pointed at him with your finger, confusing him lots. He was frustrated already and didn't wanted to be bothered, but he kept it together not wanting to be mean to one of his _fangirls_.

"Yoooo. It's you!" you yelled. Nobody paid much attention to it, since the music was very loud and people were screaming all over the place. "From the magazine! Yes, yes! Oikawa Tooru's favorite food is milk bread..." you started reciting, causing him to laugh out loud, not even suspecting the turn those events were going to take. Of course you were a fan.

"... and his personal motto is, "if you're gonna hit it, hit it til it breaks!" you mocked and laughed out loud. You thought you were being funny, but the truth was that you didn't knew him like that. Not enough to make fun of him and call him out on the things _you thought_ were ridiculous. "That's the dumbest shit I've ever read. How did you even came up with that?"

"I... "he started, but was interrupted shortly after, his face changing a little bit: Oikawa Tooru wasn't smiling anymore.

"Like seriously. You need to improve. I really don't get the hype over bread and a suggesting quote like that. It sounds like you have the personality of a twelve-year-old."

He was shocked. By the way you were so overly confident and spitting out words like you didn't have to think much about it, seemed like you meant it. Still, he recomposed himself and gave you a smirk: did he really looked like the type of guy that got intimidated? 

"Anyway, you should hire someone from marketing to get that quote fixed. I know you can level up from that. You need to. Otherwise how are you going to keep your status of pretty boy? Oh!" you continued to laugh and sing; Tooru just grabbed the glass a little bit harder since he was getting dizzy, not only by the content of his drink. The whole time a smile lighted up your face making him even more confused. Oikawa was trying hard to play it cool and not taking what you were saying very seriously. But... 

He always saw his effort coming back to him in praise from everybody. And now, a girl that he had never seen before, was going on and on about how dumb he was. Plus, he wasn't sober at all and the way your words came out of your mouth showed him that you didn't like him at all. That you thought of him as a pretty boy only, not a talented young man. To say he hated it was the biggest understatement ever made.

You never met Oikawa Tooru before, at least not personally. You've seen him from the far and read about him online, and definitely heard the team's complains about him as well. That he was arrogant, passive-agressive, had a God complex... what you didn't knew was that he had the prettiest brown eyes someone had ever seen, but it wasn't the time to point that out. In your head, Oikawa Tooru sounded like a little prick.

But being drunk and bitter weren't excuses to let whatever was going on in the back of your head take over you and insult the first person you came across with.

By the time the song ended, there was two drunk and bitter people at that garden. Daichi came out again looking for you to take you inside and the home. You waved enthusiastically at Oikawa, who didn't respond the same way. You quickly got tired, sleepy and forgot about the whole interaction for a while.

It's safe to say he didn't.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thx sm for the kuddos now im lowkey hyped

**HE WASN'T REALLY THE TYPE**

to "hit someone's line" like this, particularly not a girl's. He tried to keep it cool when he was under a substance, but lots of seconds thoughts kicked in when he started drinking. Now, he was wondering if anyone at that party thought that we sounded like a twelve-year-old when he spoke. He had to take another shot before texting you for the first time, being very nervous about the way you were going to respond if you did. He wasn't really sure of what to say, but he wanted to call you out so badly. To make you feel as confused and anxious as you made him feel, which was childish and a bit creepy. But mostly he wanted an answer. A concrete response to a question that seemed very easy, yet was so difficult to even formulate.

 _ **Why**_ didn't you like him?

The whole situation itself was ridiculous and Oikawa didn't knew why he was over obsessing about it; at moments he even thought it was funny that you had his article memorized (for a moment, he even thought that you looked cute imitating him). There was no reason for him to continue with the nonsense of finding out why you didn't you found him likeable, but he was impressed by the fact that you walked up to him and made fun of him. Usually, that's something people would do behind his back, unless they were Iwaizumi.

Oikawa had an idea that developed into a plan, and he didn't feel like stopping either. Taking a little bit of advantage of the fact that he was alcoholized, he unlocked his phone, searched for your number in his contacts (how did he get it... that's another story) and started typing the first thing that came to his mind: "hey, baby".

Well, that one message will for sure leave an impression. 

* * *

We been knew that Oikawa is nowhere a person that gives up easily. That's why even thought he could physically feel your annoyance and awkwarness through his phone screen, he promised himself he was going to get to the bottom of this situation. Sherlock Holmes type of behaviour. 

He was going to find out why you didn't like him and he was going to flip that feeling all the way around. You were going to like him. Adore him even. And then, he could go back to his reality in which he his loved and desired by everyone he knows. Was it crazy to go out of his way to change the mind of a girl he had barely seen in his life? Probably. Did his common sense vanish when he started drinking? Absolutely. 

Here he was again, drunk and sliding into your DMs ready to harass you with questions. 

[03:26] Y/N:  
listen, it's no big deal  
i was crazy drunk the other day   
i don't hate you or anything   
  
  


[03:27] Tooru:  
oh my god yes yo0 do

[03:28] Y/N:  
i do not

[03:30] Tooru:   
yo dou

[03:30] Y/N:  
we should talk about this when you're in a better state  
  


[03:34] Tooru:  
i am in great shape actually

  
[03:36] Y/N:  
you don't even know what you're typing, oikawa  
and you clearly don't wanna listen to me enough to know what i have to say  
  


[03:37] Tooru:  
you typ3 so correctly wow

[03:37] Y/N:  
bc im sober  
unlike you  
  


[03:41] Tooru:  
sorry miss sobriety

[03:42] Y/N:  
omg shut up  
this is why i dont like you  
  


[03:42] Tooru:  
rlly? D:

[03:44] Y/N:  
god, no. it was a jokE  
can you stop texting me now and go do something else?

[03:47] Tooru:  
this aint over  
i'll get to the bottom of this  
  


[03:50] Y/N:  
good for you sherlock

[03:51] Tooru:  
im srs  
you're gonna like me  
so much  
dont say i didnt warn you

[03:55] Y/N:  
goodnight, oikawa

  
[03:56] Tooru:  
goodnight y/n   
dream of me

_Read by Y/N, 03:57._


	7. Chapter 7

**TURNS OUT, YOU DID DREAM OF HIM**

but it was a weird dream. More like a nightmare, actually. You found yourself in a court, all lights turned off, looking for someone you knew to tell you what was going on. Then, a familiar voice yelled "It's not over" making you turn around to see Oikawa pointing at you when a loud whistle made you open you eyes.

What the fuck, seriously. Stress was eating your brain out.

You couldn't exactly say that Oikawa was harassing you but you also couldn't say his actions weren't a little bit stalking-like. Getting your phone number just to ask you why you didn't like him was weird. Specially if he was suggesting that he would make you end up liking him. In the other hand you honestly didn't believe that he was going to harm you in any way, so in the meantime, you decided not to block his number. Let's see how far he gets with this nonsense.

You were _**not**_ going to like Oikawa Tooru no matter what he did. You had your reasons to feel rejection towards him, but that didn't mean you were actively going out of your ways to make him knew that... Your dislikement was lowkey so far and you planned to keep it that way. When you were sober, of course.

You already felt bad enough about making him feel bad even thought you disliked him. Because being mean was something that your new you didn't do. Talking too much and making too many jokes was a part of your old self, who didn't really care about how far you went to be liked.

 _You want me to like you so bad, don't you, Tooru?_ you thought _I think you're the one that likes me after all._

That wasn't exactly your belief. You thought that he was an idiot who was desperate to get approval from others and wanted everyone to think, dream, talk, live, breathe for him and him only. He enjoyed being a sensation and that pissed you off big time. You loved your friends and admired their ambitions, but somehow, everything that you liked from them you hated it from the boy standing right next to you.

Something was sure: you couldn't stand his attitude. Even if him and, let's say, Tobio, were the exact same person with the exact same goals and feelings, something about Oikawa made you dislike him. It was confusing to say the very least, because there wasn't much difference with other volleyball players you've met. They all want to be the best. Then, one simple and destructive idea hit you.

Oikawa Tooru was _exactly_ like you.

You found yourself analysing the past few weeks and making a small recap of it all: You got drunk. Told Oikawa Tooru that you didn't like him. Now he texts you while drunk every weekend. You don't even go out so you don't ever have to see nor talk to the man. Nice, huh? Wow, how fun! Like in the movies.

That was an ironic comment, by the way.

What really ate your brain was that for the first time in a long time you were worried about what he thought about you. What your image in his head was like. And the more you tried your best not to pay mind to it, the more your past actions in the back of your brain tried convincing you otherwise.

In your opinion, you didn't have a dark, terrible past. A lot of people have it so much worse. But even if you pretended to be over it, it hurt you to see the person you were a year ago: naive, looking for acceptance everywhere and doing the most to please people who didn't care about you. Being weird and mean to others just to entertain like you were a fucking buffoon, it was another level of humiliation. That night, drunk with Oikawa, you let go all of the bitterness and old habits that you thought you burried deep down and choose to make fun of him to make yourself feel better. You sighed. In another dimension you'd thought you were definitely overthinking and reading too much into it. The thing was that, in your current reality, you made someone feel bad for a while and that guilt lived in your chest when you were alone with your thoughts.

Later that afternoon, in the opposite side of where you were (your home), Oikawa was about to bang his head against a wall.  
The same question he asked himself the day before was burning behind his eyes: would he ever be brave enough to talk to you being a hundred percent conscious? Matter of fact, would he ever go up to you and do what he needed to do to make you change your mind about him?

Drunk texting wasn't working, clearly. You never _sounded_ very excited to talk to him and he knew he was bothering you (like he often did to people). He regretted it every time he woke up the next morning and kept on forgetting his own ultimatums on a weekend night.

Oikawa never knew in what way alcohol would hit and sometimes he didn't cared enough about it to stop himself from drinking. Let's add that recently you ran through his head unconsciously: he wondered what you liked and disliked in general, what your standards looked like. What could you possibly see in him that upset you. So of course, every single time he received a text form Kindaichi saying his parents weren't home, his first bright idea was to go there, drink and try to talk to you. Ridiculous, really.

So, if both of you continued to tell yourselves that your behavior was truly stupid and non important, that it was a nonsense of a chase, a dumb and insignificant cat-and-mouse situation that could end any time..

...how come neither of you two could really stop thinking about each other?


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some chapters are super short so... double update today:) thanks for the kuddos and the bookmarks they make my heart go woOsh

**[00:31oikawa:**  
have u ever played vplleyball in ur life

... Oh, boy. 

At this point you kinda got used to receiving random texts from Oikawa, but sometimes they got too random. Not only the texts he sent, but the times and days; sometimes you would wake up in a Monday morning with some missed texts from him. What concerned you was that he seemed drunk in every single one of those texts: You could picture him sitting in a couch in the middle of a crowded house with some dark jeans and a black t-shirt, holding a bottle of vodka in his left hand and his phone in the right one as he texted only with that hand - making all those typos that looked so familiar to you now-, maybe even getting pushed by other people on the same couch and making him write terribly or spilling his drink. You wondered if he actually drank vodka or maybe something else. Definitely not the type of dude to settle for nothing less, like beer. You remembered from that one party you shared (you know, the one that started all of this) the image of him taking that red, plastic cup to his mouth with his eyes never leaving yours and a shiver shook you in your own chair. 

Stop. What the fuck are you thinking about?

 **[00:35] Y/N:**  
umm  
yes once or twice w my friends

 **[00:40] oikawa:**  
what d9 u think about the way I play?

 **[00:41] Y/N:**  
i think ur a really good player?? ive only seen u once tho  
why?

_Read 00:42._


	9. Chapter 9

_**OIKAWA IS TYPING...** _

_hey. im sober rn lol. sorry for last night. how are you?_

He swallowed, with his hand shaking in the most slight and unnoticeable way. What was he so nervous about? It was all about pressing send and not looking back. He seemed to be very good at it last night. Maybe if he changed some words...

_hello, y/n. im sorry abt last night. im sober now, by the way. how are you doing?_

Too weird.

_Good evening. I hope this text finds you well-_

Hell no. Extremely formal.

"Fuck this." He muttered to himself. "It shouldn't be so hard to text a woman." He deleted what he previously typed and closed the app, throwing his phone somewhere under his bed.


End file.
